By Cristie Gardner

"Happy talk, keep a-talkin' happy talk;
Talk about things you like to do.
You gotta have a dream; if you don't have a dream,
How you gonna have a dream come true?"

This cheerful tune, written by Rodgers and Hammerstein in 1949 for South Pacific, may sound simple, but its message is powerful and true.

So much has been said about attitude and gratitude—and equally as much about authenticity and transparency. At times, those ideas can seem to clash. If I'm being truly authentic and transparent, does that mean I have to lay all my flaws bare? Am I supposed to apologize for who I am, how I look, or how I act… all in the name of being "real"?

Does authenticity mean I’m stuck with where I am, because it’s simply “who I am right now”? If I live in one house, does that mean I can’t move? If I dislike my job, must I stay in it forever? If I’ve made a plan, does that mean I’m obligated to follow through—no matter what?

Sometimes… but not always.

Believing we have no options is a lie.

The real secret isn’t just in recognizing who I am, but also recognizing who I’m capable of becoming.

There’s a lot of debate over phrases like “Fake it ‘til you make it.” Some criticize it as inauthentic or deceptive. But maybe it’s time to reframe it.

We are, both literally and spiritually, children of Heavenly Parents. That means we are capable of becoming so much more. So if we settle for what’s comfortable now, if we label it “authenticity” but use it to avoid growth… are we being authentic or are we just deceiving ourselves?

Marvin J. Ashton once said:

“Set your goals. But don't become frustrated because there are no obvious victories. Remind yourself that striving can be more important than arriving.”

That perspective has been true in my own life. The best path forward, for me, is one with a steady direction—even if it allows for detours, delays, or moments of discouragement. When I can see where I’m headed—even vaguely—I find the strength to keep striving.

And I’ve learned something else, too: I can change my mind.
I can adjust my destination as I grow.
Sometimes, on the road toward one goal, I discover a better one. And I can be grateful for the first path because it brought me to a place where I could even see the second.

That is not failure. That is growth.

We each have a divine right to shape our own journey as we become more of who we were born to be. No one else has that right. And no one else carries the responsibility of walking your path but you.

I think of a woman who, for most of her life, believed she would become an attorney—just like her father. She went to college, then law school, and practiced law for three years. But she was miserable. Her days were filled with criticism, conflict, and litigation. Forgiveness and joy felt foreign. Her chosen career didn’t align with who she truly was—or who she wanted to become.

So, she tried something different: she used her beautiful voice on the radio. And suddenly, she found joy in a new calling—uplifting others with encouragement and positivity. She didn’t waste her years in law. They brought her to a place of clarity. They gave her the courage to pivot, to reroute, to choose joy.

That shift required bravery. But she let go of the plan she thought she wanted and stepped into a path that aligned with her deeper purpose.

So, let’s return to the phrase: “Fake it ‘til you make it.”

Maybe it’s not about pretending to be something you’re not. Maybe it’s about practicing who you know you’re meant to be—even if you're not there yet.

Know who you are. Know where you’re going. And keep showing up for the person you’re becoming.

Practice it. Live into it. And before you know it, your dream will feel less like a far-off vision… and more like home.

_________________

•   To discover how to start choosing more effectively now, read The Jackrabbit Factor (FREE!)  
•   If you want more step-by-step guidance on creating the life you really want, join me in the Mindset Mastery program.
•   If you want my help overcoming that giant obstacle right in front of you, learn more and sign up for Genius Bootcamp.