By Melanie Valderrama

The Law of Relativity states that your situation isn’t inherently good or bad—it only becomes one or the other when you compare it to something else.

I used to be a chronic complainer. The weather and my housing situation were two of my favorite things to grumble about—but honestly, I could find something to complain about in almost any situation. Just hand me a moment, and I could spot the flaw.

But when I learned about the Law of Relativity, I decided to test it out. Could I actually shift my mindset by comparing my situation to something else? Could I train my eyes to look for the good?

I started with the weather. I’ve never been a fan of extremes—too hot or too cold, and I was irritated. But that winter, when the snow came, I tried something new. I looked for reasons to be thankful. I started noticing the moisture the snow provided and the beauty in the fresh, white landscape. I chose to see it through my children’s eyes—snowmen, snow angels, snowball fights. Suddenly, it wasn’t so bad. It was fun.

Then came summer. I chose gratitude again. I appreciated the warmth of the sun, the chance to wear sandals and paint my toenails, and the joy of taking my kids to the pool. They love playing outside for hours, and they have so many neighborhood friends. I realized—no matter how I feel about the weather, I can’t change it. So I might as well enjoy it.

My housing situation was another favorite complaint. My husband, two children, and I live in a condo, and I used to get hung up on the fact that it felt too small. But now? I choose to be grateful that I no longer live in my parents’ basement. I don’t have a lawn to mow. It’s easy to meet neighbors. It’s small enough to clean quickly. And we live in a wonderful neighborhood. Our home has running water, electricity, heating, air conditioning, indoor plumbing—it protects me from the very weather I used to complain about.

And then I read The Hiding Place by Corrie ten Boom. Corrie and her sister Betsie were taken to a Nazi concentration camp for helping Jews during the Holocaust. One moment in the book changed me. The sisters were reading a Bible verse about thanking God in all circumstances—not just the pleasant ones. Their barracks were infested with fleas, and Betsie insisted they needed to thank God for the fleas. Corrie thought that was crazy… until they found out the guards refused to enter the barracks because of the fleas. That meant the women could read the Bible and share hope freely without interference. That story floored me. It gave me perspective.

After finishing the book, I felt rich—truly wealthy. I have running water and hot showers. A clean bed. Food. Freedom. Safety. Communication. A family. I felt overwhelmingly grateful for what I already have.

Ever since, I’ve been working on turning complaints into gratitude. And you know what? It works. I feel better. I see differently. What once looked gray and dull now feels full of light and color.

Gratitude really does shift everything.

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