Between Life and Death
May 03, 2018
By Cristie Gardner
I watched in awe as our daughter delivered a healthy, 7 lb 10 oz baby boy, Caleb. We were with her through the final stages of labor, and it was clear why they call it "labor"—it's hard work!
As little Caleb’s head crowned, a problem became apparent. The cord that had faithfully sustained him for months—delivering life and nourishment—was wrapped around his shoulder, tucked under his arm, and looped around his neck. With each push, the cord tightened, choking him and bruising his tiny face. The midwife worked feverishly, trying to slip the cord over his head, but it was strong, unyielding—impossible to pull or snap. “You’ve got to push and get this baby out NOW,” she commanded.
With one final, determined push, Caleb’s shoulder cleared the birth canal, and he shot out so quickly he was nearly airborne. The midwife caught him expertly, freed the constricting cord, and within moments, he pinked up beautifully—though his sweet face stayed bruised. Later, the midwife told me that those few seconds when the cord is stuck can feel like endless hours. Ironically, the same cord that gives life can threaten to take it away if it becomes too tight for too long. Only through that final, powerful push did our grandson find freedom.
The Law of Polarity teaches that everything has two poles: good and evil, love and hate, attraction and repulsion. Just like the North and South Poles on the globe, or the positive and negative terminals on a battery, everything in the universe has an opposite. Duality gives depth and meaning to our experiences—and makes the good all the sweeter.
In Caleb’s case, the cord that gave him life nearly cost him his life.
Could we truly know happiness without sadness? Is there love without the pain that sometimes accompanies it? Darkness without light? Even in relationships, is there attraction without opposing energies? We’ve all heard “opposites attract”—it’s the Law of Polarity summed up in two words. In fact, it’s often called the Law of Opposites.
A powerful passage from the Book of Mormon captures this beautifully, where an ancient prophet teaches his son: “It must needs be, that there is an opposition in all things. If not so, … righteousness could not be brought to pass, neither wickedness, neither holiness nor misery, neither good nor bad” (2 Nephi 2:11; see also verse 15).
Without the ability to contrast our experiences, how would we fully appreciate anything? If every day were good, how would we even recognize goodness? We need the difficult days to highlight the ones when everything flows just right.
If the sun never set, would we ever marvel at the stars or the glow of the moon? Would we even be driven to explore the far reaches of space?
When you pick up one end of a stick, you pick up the other. What seem like opposites are really two inseparable parts of the same thing. Hot and cold are simply points along the same continuum—you can’t have one without acknowledging the other.
In working with the "Law of Attraction," many people long for financial abundance but unknowingly cancel their own energy flow. They fear debt even as they affirm prosperity. When both polarities are present and equally strong, they neutralize each other.
If you're pouring energy into your intentions, but your thoughts are also steeped in fear or doubt, you’re working against yourself by mixing polarities.
Napoleon Hill, author of Think and Grow Rich, said it well: "Every adversity, every failure and every heartache carries with it the seed of an equivalent or a greater benefit."
Therapist Drew Coster shared some powerful insights on the Law of Polarity:
As a change facilitator and therapist, I recognize there really isn’t a one-size-fits-all approach to being healthy and happy. Which is why books by gurus, and therapies sometimes work and sometimes don’t.
The truth is just because something worked well for one person, that doesn’t mean it will work the same for you. And sometimes finding the right solution can be a challenge.
So, what happens if you’ve tried multiple approaches to change something in your life and still feel stuck? Sometimes, the simplest approach is the most helpful, which is why I introduce the Law of Polarity to my collaborative partners.
There’s nothing magical about the Law of Polarity. You already understand it: there’s duality in everything. Positive and negative. Up and down. Good and bad. Dark and light. Even at the atomic level, a positron cannot exist without an electron.
So why focus only on the negative when we could consciously shift our thinking to the positive?
It’s simple—but powerful. And when we apply it, it opens up new possibilities.
So, how do you use it?
First, step back and observe your thinking, your emotions, and your actions in a difficult situation. Then, ask yourself: What is this experience teaching me? If you can detach from the emotion, even briefly, you’ll see that the negative polarity shows you what you don’t want—and by contrast, what you do want.
For example:
Negative Polarity: I’m so lonely.
Positive Lesson: I need connection.
Action: Join groups with like-minded people to build friendships.
Negative Polarity: I don’t have a significant other.
Positive Lesson: I need to nurture self-love and open myself to relationships.
Action: Join social activities and online dating services.
Negative Polarity: I’m stuck at work.
Positive Lesson: I crave growth and fulfillment.
Action: Update my resume, job hunt daily, explore continuing education.
Negative Polarity: My life feels unfulfilling.
Positive Lesson: I need purpose and service.
Action: Volunteer and engage in meaningful work.
Notice how the energy shifts when you flip the polarity? The situation hasn’t changed—your mindset has. That shift creates clarity and action.
The Law of Polarity may seem simple, but that’s its power. Change doesn’t have to be complicated. Life won’t magically change with positive thinking alone, but learning to see alternatives through polarity transforms the way we approach our challenges.
C.G. Jung wisely said, “But there is no energy unless there is a tension of opposites; hence it is necessary to discover the opposite to the attitude of the conscious mind.”
Several years ago, when I worked for US Airways in Cleveland, my station manager insisted that we work on the hard cement floors of the airport without padding—he was more worried about tripping hazards than protecting our feet. As a general agent, I spent my days at the ticket counter lifting bags (some heavier than 50 pounds), boarding passengers, and often running to meet incoming flights. I loved the job. I loved...
_________________
- To discover how to start choosing more effectively now, read The Jackrabbit Factor (FREE!)
- If you want more step-by-step guidance on creating the life you really want, join me in the Mindset Mastery program.
- If you want my help overcoming that giant obstacle right in front of you, learn more and sign up for Genius Bootcamp.