Parenting Transformation Journey – Page 6

I just went to check on my daughter to see if she was ready to follow instructions so her 24 hours could begin. The moment I brought it up, she flipped out—convinced that her time in her room should have counted toward the 24 hours. I gently reminded her (again) that the 24-hour clock doesn’t start until she’s calm and ready to follow the instructions already given.

Heavy sigh.

I know this is hard for her.

She started crying and thrashing again, saying, “I don’t want to follow instructions and I don’t want to talk to you because I didn’t know this time didn’t count!”

I reminded her that she was never sent to her room—she chose to go there. And that it had been explained several times (even by her sister!) that the clock would start when she came to talk to me, ready to begin. But she never came… because she was still mad.

So, clearly, she’s not ready yet. And that’s okay.

Nicholeen Peck has mentioned that she’s had foster children—maybe even just one, but still—who went three days before deciding it wasn’t worth it and finally chose to begin the 24 hours. That example has stuck with me. There’s no punishment bigger than this one; it’s the ceiling. But that consistency is where the magic happens.

I’m learning that this predictability is actually what helps children feel safest. Mine have complained plenty of times before: “I didn’t know that was the consequence,” or “You just made that up,” or “My sibling did the same thing and nothing happened.”

Those reactions are valid—and a clear sign that something needed to change.

I fully expect this transition to be uncomfortable for all of us… but only for a short time. These are hard lessons. But this is also where real change begins. Once the new habits take hold, I believe we’ll start to see more peace in the home. More mutual respect. More structure. More clarity. And better choices—because cause and effect will finally make sense before consequences hit.

This is what self-government looks like.

If you disagree with anything I’m doing, then before leaving your comments, all I ask is that you please first watch this BBC episode so you can see where this is going. They say that in the middle of a life-saving surgery it can appear as though there has been a murder in the room. It might get a little messy in the middle, but I do believe and trust in the end result. Each of my posts – standing alone – will not provide the big picture… but the episode does. Enjoy!

_________________

•  To discover how to start choosing more effectively now, read The Jackrabbit Factor (FREE!) 
•  If you want more step-by-step guidance on creating the life you really want, join me in the Mindset Mastery program.
•  If you want my help overcoming that giant obstacle right in front of you, learn more and sign up for Genius Bootcamp.