By Matthew Piling

A few years ago, my wife and I decided to celebrate our 20th wedding anniversary with a trip to Hawaii. It would be our first real getaway since having kids. Sure, we’d done quick overnighters or weekend escapes, but never anything that involved hopping on a plane and leaving the kids behind for an extended time. We were beyond excited.

In preparation for all the beach time, we both decided to trim up and get in better shape. I was in my early forties—and it showed. I had plenty of excuses for how I’d let myself go, but deep down, I knew I didn’t want to keep living in harmony with my dad-bod status.

I had lost weight before, but it had always felt like a chore. This time was different. I wasn’t doing it just because I should. I was preparing for something that lit me up. That anticipation fueled me, and within six months, I had dropped 50 pounds, toned up, and felt better than I ever had in my adult life.

The best part? I wasn’t just looking good for our trip—I’d adopted new habits and felt certain I’d look and feel even better for our 30th anniversary than I now did for our 20th because of the path I had set myself on.

The trip was amazing. We made unforgettable memories. And then… we came home.

While we were away, something went sideways at work. Whether or not it was my fault, I was pulled aside and told that my job now hinged on how quickly I could fix it. The pressure hit hard. I slapped on some band-aid solutions to stop the bleeding, but the root issues were going to take months to resolve. My healthy habits? Paused. Just temporarily, I told myself.

“I’ve got this,” I thought. “I’ll maintain as best I can and jump back in as soon as the dust settles.”

But the stress grew. The habits slipped. And within a few short months—fewer than it took to lose the weight—I had gained every pound back.

Still, I reassured myself: “I lost it once. I can do it again. As soon as I have the time…”

That time came sooner than I expected—because they let me go before the issue was resolved.

Suddenly, I had all the time in the world. And still… I didn’t get back on track.

Looking back, it’s easy to say the weight came back because I stopped exercising and eating clean. But over a broader view of my life, I’ve come to see something deeper. It wasn’t the lack of habits that caused my slide—it was the lack of focus.

Crunches, pushups, healthy meals… those matter. But they’re not what transformed me. What transformed me was the vision I had of who I wanted to be—what it would feel like to walk on the beach looking the way I had dreamed.

That vision transmuted me.

I've followed countless health plans before without meaningful results. But when I was emotionally connected to a goal—when I could see and feel what I wanted—it all came together. The work didn’t feel like work. The weight dropped. The energy returned. I was becoming the version of me I had envisioned.

Without focus, the effort becomes just motion.

Vision, properly held, will always trump habits properly executed.

Thoughts are things. And when we send the right thoughts into the universe, their vibration draws the people, conditions, and ideas we need. But that’s not enough. Those elements need a place to land. That’s what vision gives us: a spiritual framework—a container—for physical reality to take shape.

Without that form, the resources might show up… but with nowhere to go, they drift away.

Leslie often talks about the acorn. Everything the acorn needs to become a mighty oak is already encoded in its DNA. It doesn’t need to go get anything—it just needs to grow. But not all acorns become oak trees. Some remain just acorns.

Why? Because the acorn must see itself as an oak tree. It must claim that identity and stretch toward it.

Likewise, if we see only where we are—and not who we’re meant to become—we stay stuck. But when we really see what’s possible… when our focus is clear and consistent… the transformation becomes inevitable.

The truth is: the resources are already in place. The process has already begun. All that’s left… is to keep our eyes fixed on the oak.

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