By Marcianne Stewart

When I first heard Eleanor Roosevelt’s quote, “Comparison is the thief of joy,” it really resonated with me!  Naturally, I found myself using comparison three different ways—which resulted in several different emotions—none of which were joy.

First, I compared my weaknesses to someone else’s strengths, and I felt:

• insignificant

• insecure

• weak

• helpless

Then, I flipped it and compared my strengths to someone else’s weaknesses, and I felt:

• pride

• superiority

• arrogance

• vanity

Finally, I compared my hardships to someone else’s and found myself feeling:

• ashamed

• invalidated

• inadequate

• worthless

So yeah… no joy in sight.

Then I came across Hidden Treasures by Leslie Householder, and I was introduced to the Law of Relativity. It says that nothing is inherently good or bad—until we decide. We assign the meaning. We hold the power to label our circumstances however we choose.

One story from Genius Bootcamp really brought this home. It’s about a farmer in ancient China who owned a horse.

“You are so lucky!” his neighbors told him, “To have a horse to pull your cart.”
“Maybe,” the farmer replied.

Then the horse ran away.
“Oh no, what terrible luck!” the neighbors cried.
“Maybe,” said the farmer.

A few days later, the horse returned with six wild horses.
“Wow! You’re so lucky!” the neighbors exclaimed.
“Maybe,” the farmer replied.

Then the farmer’s son broke his leg trying to tame one of the wild horses.
“That’s awful!” they cried.
“Maybe,” the farmer said.

Soon after, soldiers came and took all the able-bodied young men to war—except the farmer’s son.
“You’re so lucky!” the neighbors said once again.
“Maybe,” said the farmer.

This story cracked something open in me. The farmer wasn’t denying reality—he was choosing not to label it prematurely. He stayed open. The neighbors were quick to slap on labels of good or bad, while the farmer simply observed.

What if we did the same?
What if we chose to assign positive meaning to every situation we encounter?

That’s the Law of Relativity in action. When we compare our situation to something worse, it instantly feels better. That’s not delusion—it’s intention.

So maybe… comparison isn’t the thief of joy at all.
Maybe it’s the catalyst.
Maybe it’s the lens that helps us shift into joy—when we use it intentionally.

One of the ways I do this is by asking myself, “Okay, how could this be worse?” Then I use my imagination to fill in the blanks.

Take today for example. I was rushing out the door for an appointment when two unexpected things happened.

1. Our robot vacuum, Carl, got tangled up in my dog Mozzie’s leash.

2. Mozzie promptly threw up. Twice.

Now, old me might’ve spiraled into, “Ugh! I do not have time for this today.”
But instead, I paused and thought, “Well… at least Carl didn’t get stuck in the throw-up. That would’ve been worse!”

And just like that, I shifted. I felt:

• gratitude

• joy

• capable

• inspired

That’s the power of reframing through the Law of Relativity. And maybe—just maybe—it’s how we invite joy back in.

_________________

•   To discover how to start choosing more effectively now, read The Jackrabbit Factor (FREE!)  
•   If you want more step-by-step guidance on creating the life you really want, join me in the Mindset Mastery program.
•   If you want my help overcoming that giant obstacle right in front of you, learn more and sign up for Genius Bootcamp.