By Katalina Bonds

The Law of Polarity states that everything has an opposite. Dark has light. Bad has good. Male has female. Every negative has a positive. This law promises that every adversity carries within it the seed of an equal or even greater benefit. That means our struggles—no matter how heavy—have opposites that carry more value than the pain we endured.

Well, Alleluia! There are real, powerful benefits to our struggles. And the bigger the struggle? The greater the potential blessing. Alleluia! I seriously cannot say that enough. What a relief that is. Truly. I've walked through some difficult seasons—and while I know my hardships are unique to me and yours are unique to you (I’ll write more on that later)—I’ve carried some weighty burdens.

I’ve lived with family members who were incredibly hard to be around. I’ve raised two sons with autism. I’ve walked alongside a daughter navigating the messy, turbulent teenage years. I’ve had marriage struggles—many of which were shaped by the exact challenges I just listed. And yet, here I am. Living in more joy than I’ve ever known. And it’s no accident. It’s the result of intentionally applying success principles that truly work for my good.

Back when I was fresh out of high school, I felt spiritually led to join the Army. I signed up for four years because I had a deep inner knowing it would lead me to Germany—and that decision led me to the love of my life. There’s so much more to that story (for another day!), but meeting Brian was the start of everything.

Brian has been the best partner I could have ever asked for in this lifetime.

Let me break it down:

• Brian’s strengths are my weaknesses.

• My strengths are his weaknesses.

• He’s intelligent, full of potential.

• He’s a man of integrity and deep kindness.

• And together, we’re a strong team.

Honestly, I could go on and on. I had no doubt that life with Brian would be nothing short of amazing. Ha-ha! I can’t help but laugh now at my naïveté. I was so sure it would be smooth sailing. And all those things I believed about Brian? They’re still true. But here's what I didn’t realize back then:

The Law of Polarity is always at work—just like the Law of Gravity. You don’t have to see it to be affected by it.

Brian and I have had a wonderful life together. But we’ve also had moments where divorce was on the table. I’ve cried more tears than I can count. We both escaped into our own coping habits—him into gaming, me into reading—just to avoid facing our real issue: communication. It sat there between us, obvious and unresolved. We just didn’t know how to open up, be vulnerable, and create the safety we needed to really talk.

But then something changed.

We began intentionally applying success principles. We began declaring:

Everything works to my benefit.

 Let me tell you—poor communication in a marriage can feel like hanging by a thread. But we clung to our unconditional love for our kids. We lived in gratitude for the family we had. And, honestly, we held on because we were meant to be together. Don’t believe me? Go back and read how I was spiritually led to him. That didn’t happen by accident.

Now? We talk about everything.
If there’s even the hint of a miscommunication, we pause. We talk. No assumptions. No stories. Just a desire to understand each other. We’ve learned to be open, vulnerable, and honest—and we’re loving it. We recreate our relationship every single day, and we’ve made it a priority.

Looking back, I see how many blessings came from the struggle. Here are just a few:

• I grew stronger.

• I learned something new.

• I became a better version of myself.

• I mended relationships I thought were lost.

And now, I’m writing these words from the other side of a communication struggle I never thought we’d overcome.

I don’t even recognize the people we used to be—because we are so different now. That’s the beauty of polarity. Total transformation.

I sit here amazed, reflecting on the joy we’ve found, the knowledge we’ve gained, the wisdom that’s settled deep into our bones. And I realize—I am the reward. The person I’ve become is the gift that came from walking through the fire.

I’m no longer the woman who began this journey back in 1988. And that’s something to celebrate.

So if you’re facing hard things right now, please don’t give up. The greater the adversity, the more powerful the blessing that’s waiting for you. Just remember Brian and Rosa Long—and you’ll know it’s true.

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